THE NIGERIAN CHILD MARRIAGE RUCKUS - ALL THERE IS TO KNOW.

Finally, I get to blog about the issue that has practically turned Nigeria upside down. Why now?! Lemme explain. I wanted to get my facts together before blogging, but also hoped that the issue would have suffered a quick and natural death. Well, here is my angle. Lest I leave the most dreadful part out, I had a BAD DREAM. *spooky*. Remember the article "Letter to my future husband"? Yh!, I was daydreaming about it when I had the scariest premonition ever. Click here, if you missed it. In the daydream, I was having the time of my life and enjoying the moment *my Traditional marriage*. There was music and feasting and just when the song, Ada Ada by Flavor was about to end, where he says "Mummy bye bye, daddy bye bye, in 9 months time we will come visiting with a boy and girl..." I heard this loud cry that just sort of killed the moment for me. I was so angry and vexed that I turned towards the direction of the cry where I saw myself... I was older and there was a man beside me- my husband! I was wailing and throwing myself all over the ground. Immediately, I turned to where the me in my dream was looking at and wailing, when I saw a girl, a 2 years old child. MY CHILD! WEARING OLEKU!!(oleku is an African attire with a big blouse and a wrapper tied round the waist, it can be long or short . Here, it was the short one) BEING HELD BY A MAN! AN OLD MAN! HE LOOKED LIKE A PANDA IN AN AGBADA!!! DRAGGING MY DAUGHTER, MY BABY WHO HAD JUST TURNED TWO YEARS!!! TELLING ME THAT IN 9 MONTHS TIME THEY WOULD COME VISITING WITH TWINS????!
Continue reading, there is more....

I jerked from the daydream and realized, shit just got ugly! This issue of child marriage does not just affect some but all of US. My dear, see prayer and fasting naaa... If I catch any potbellied man near my child in the hopeful future, by GAWD, that man is dead meat. That was when I decided to blog about the issue.

First, we have to appreciate and thank God and the Senators for bringing this issue to our notice if not, we would still be super ignorant. The Senate, in the past week met to amend and remove the 1999 constitution section 29(4)(b) which states that "any woman who is married shall be deemed to be of full age" in addition to the section, subsection (a) defines full age as someone who is 18 years and above. Rumour has it that ...the whole issue went to a down side when Senator Yerima said and stated that removing that section would be going against the law protecting Islamic and customary laws. We hear that he played the religion card and the Senate board fell like a pack of cards. Then again, it should be corrected that your Senators are not in any way Paedophiles if at all there is any, it has to be Yerima...according to the evidence *Hearsay evidence* hehehehehe... What we should understand here, is that this is most likely an issue of religious inclination and belief, nothing more and nothing less. The truth is bitter but you still have to swallow the pill. The islamic religion accepts this, that is why in the north you see a lot  babies being pushed into marriages at utterly absurd ages and no matter how hard you try to fight it, you have to still understand that this is their way of life and respect it, even though it does not follow with what you believe in. Still on the subject of Yerima, we have reason to believe that this is why he was not arrested for marrying a 13yr old girl, who is now 15 years and even divorcing one of his wives before she was 18.

You know I can't ignore the comments made on several media platforms from 'grieved' Nigerians We have the comments of celebs like Stella Damascus and our own Miss Poko (Tontolet) who have taken a stand on this very sensitive and delicate issue, but while one just poured a little too much emotion on the media while avoiding the real subject, the other was just plain disrespectful and lacking in any form of awareness and maybe slightly intoxicated before 'commenting'. Off course, I had to use the comment as follows ; According to the UN, early marriage " denies a girl child her childhood rights, limits her opportunities, disturbs her education, makes society discriminate against her, jeopardises her health, which leads to premature death of any girl child". When you see this, you can immediately relate it to what these northern girls are passing through day by day! 

According to save a child an NGO, Nigeria is one of the worst places to raise a child. About 90,000 babies die the same day they are born. This children are not even give a chance to live due to poor health care especially in the north and when they do live, they are sent to even greater torture by being married off at really tender ages?! even the ones who died seem to have it better off. Still on the Yerima matter, Zamfara State, has the worst health care facility, development, nutrition, education empowerment and productivity. The North- East alone has 5 times the highest rate of global maternal mortality, according to the punch newspaper. Then you have the increasing issue of VVF( Vesicovaginal fistula or recto vaginal fistula) a situation resulting as a  result of early child pregnancy on girls who are not yet fully developed and their organs not ready to bear such burdens or stress. The list is endless. It goes on and on. 

Making this legal and keeping that section intact, is going to open doors to child molestation, rape and paedophiles will be able to roam the streets freely making parents and guardians alike really scared of their young daughters going outside( paranoia). Won't this be a great idea to open the prison gates of hell and let out all those rapists, child molesters and paedophiles who have destroyed the lives of young girls and children alike making them emotionally, physically and emotionally traumatised? Because, hey the government or the senate has made it legal and right, simply because of religion! It is now on record that Yerima is a man who takes his religion seriously, especially those parts of Islam that pertain little girls. How can a full grown man look at a child and have the heart to do just what he wants to be engraved in our Laws 'forever' if he isn't sick in the head?? Well guess what, its already an illegality called 'Child Molestation" and celebrating this insanity as a 'marriage' just reeks of 'Jail term'!!! I know we would get there someday, I believe that there are some committed gentlemen and ladies in our National Assembly who are committed to making our Nigeria the envy of the world! We are an educated, enlightened and exposed nation (at least we are trying to be) therefore, there are issues that when brought up are not supposed to cause such an uproar because all we have to do is eliminate those past laws and put in place better and improved ones to suit the now generation. Reading the Sun newspaper of July 28 2013, they asked questions to people and they posted their answers, I want to quote what ISHAQ AKINTOLA, who is the EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, MUSLIM RIGHTS CONCERN, had to say about this issue; 

There are only four conditions in Islamic marriage. Firstly, there should be a proposal from a man. Another is an acceptance by the woman offering to be paid by the man. The parents of the man and the woman are not one of the conditions in Islam. No matter the age difference, it doesn't matter in Islam whether the girl is a minor, the husband cannot touch her until she attains puberty, until when she has come of age. Even after maturity, if the girl doesn't like the man, she has the right to opt out of the marriage. If you consummate marriage with a minor in Islam, it is not final until when the girl attains maturity. There is no need for noise being made over this issue all over the place. Nigeria is a multi-religious, and multicultural society. We need to understand our cultural and religious differences. Maybe all these activists have no business poking in the affairs that concern Muslims or Islam related matters but when the issues bother on natural fairness or begins to trample on the rights of others (We the Children....sweet 16 or 13), then the Laws of the Nation should uphold these rights. I have female friends of the Islam faith (Muslims), who are well above 20 and have not yet gotten married and their parents are cool with them waiting until they are ready to live with a man forever in a lawful marriage. NO MAN OR PARENT (except Yerima and probably a few uninformed individuals) would want to subject their children to early child marriage and the consequences that follow. Every parent wants the best for their child.

If they want that section 29(b) to stand in the NIGERIAN constitution not Sharia Law, then they should make a clause following that section. A clause on compulsory BASIC EDUCATION (at least to a senior secondary school level). Example: "Any woman married shall be deemed to be of full age, if and only when she has completed her mandatory free basic education". This should kill two birds with a stone. Yerima and his followers may thereafter pursue their passions in other countries or 'jail' with other excuses. No one will stand against their decisions or inclinations whatsoever.

Now my own personal problem with all of this, is why in a nation where so much is happening - Boko Haram, ASUU's unending strike, Rivers State House of Assembly brawl, Mr. Chidi Lloyd and other forms of insanity etc., our senator's still have to worry about the issue of child marriage because of a continuous itch in the pants or misinformation of a Senator??? Also, when did the word 'WOMAN' become or mean a female anything? A woman according to the Oxford English Dictionary is an ADULT FEMALE, FEMALE WORKER/EMPLOYEE, WIFE OR LOVER. How did this become interpreted to include or describe a 6yr old female child?!

 And for the rest of the public *bless your soul* who are trying to put the word out #childnotbride--> she needs a pen not a penis, education not ejaculation... I have no idea who came up with this ridiculous tagline.  As far as I'm concerned, there is something perverted about it. How do you explain what a penis or an ejaculation is to a child when they ask you? You know they will be asking questions, right? I'm sure you also know what happens when you don't answer 'satisfactorily'. They will meet that "uncle" (that everyone knows is a paedophile  We all have those somewhere, everywhere) in schools, on the streets, in our families (I'm sure they're not in yours o!) who would explain vividly to these little girls. And your action to drive a message home will only be driving that demon to your child's bedroom.

 Leave a comment below. Be audacious, be funny, be critical if you like but please don't be nasty! Thank you