How do you break tragic news to a person or persons you have so much love, respect and admiration for? That is when wisdom comes in. Lemme let you in on a secret …. Hush hush (lowkey tins, don’t let your mama know)!

 When you want to break a bad news… terrible news… wanna come out of the closet… wanna let it all out, no matter what it is, the key is to tell a worse news however bad the information is. You want the other party to be understanding, tell them a worse story that is a lie. For example, you get pregnant and you don’t know how to tell your parents without them killing you, tell them something worse like you have contacted the HIV virus and when you see their face descriptive of an upcoming heart attack, just break the ice by saying “... oh, am just kidding I don’t have HIV, I just wanted to see your reaction if I actually did, I just got pregnant and I am so sorry I got knocked up before marriage. Please forgive me…” You’ll notice them breathe out a sign of relief, but not to worry, no matter what the outcome might be it won’t be as severe as what would have happened if you had just come out with the dirt rag.

When it was time for me to tell my parents the news of the “KICK”, I couldn’t just walk straight to my parents and tell them what happened. No!  No!!  No!!!… There are ways to do things. I told my siblings first of the news and they laughed saying;” at least you have gotten what you always wanted”. I and my sis went to meet my dad for a meeting concerning me which she called. My brother was the backup plan if things got out of hand. My sister started the meeting with “… erm, daddy what will happen if Ihuoma got expelled?!” The intro wasn’t what I expected… I was stunned, lost of words my total face description had the inscription WTF written all over. The most amazing thing was that for the whole time (I don’t know how many seconds or minutes passed but it was a long damn time, the longest  I had ever noticed of my Dad finding words) my Dad was silent. He was obviously more lost than I was.

When he finally found words, he said; “What do you mean by Ihuoma being expelled?!” Then he gave me “The Look” (the look that can raise the dead and eventually bring about the end of the world) . I was quickly rescued when my sister still stressed on the question and asked what if it happened?! With his gaze still on me, he replied, “then, we will find a solution to the problem”. All this time, my eyes were on the ground looking for what I did not lose, but occasionally looking from my sis to my Father but most of the time my sister.

Now my Father wasn’t having any more of this mind games, as he sat up and forward, I sat back facing the ceiling (in order to avoid any unexpected bruise). At this time, my Mum had come in and sat down trying to understand the tension between us all. Now, my father’s tone had changed, he demanded knowledge of what was really going on. My sister said; “Ihuoma has been screened out from studying law and pushed to Political science to continue her educational career. At least it’s better than being expelled abi?!
Now I was regretting why I didn’t just come on my own to tell my parents than have my sister tell the situation because I don’t know which was worse, the intro or the outro…

The disappointment flooded my parents faces like a tsunami, I felt like I had betrayed them in the worst possible way…

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